Death Cafe write-ups
The Hatfield, MA, Senior Center Death Cafe was held on Nov 2, 2023. Fifteen older adults met to discuss death and our common mortal experience over the traditional coffee and cake. Individuals voiced curiosity and a desire to talk about a subject that is often feared and avoided. Topics included the meaning of a "good death", self determined life closure, and planning for one's eventual demise. Ways to discuss one's end of life care wishes with loved ones was explored, as well as using humor to offset the pangs of dying and grief.
Discussion was engaging, spirited and supportive, and those in attendance welcomed this opportunity ...
The Death Cafe was attended by eleven open-hearted people. We sat around the table and took turns sharing thoughts, feelings, experiences, and questions about death, dying, and grief.
Another bright sunny Saturday in Portland, another afternoon of sharing, supporting and connecting around death and dying. Amber facilitated our discussion--kept it moving and kept it open.
Fear was a big part of the conversaion--family members who fear a parent's death, our own fear of death (or is it of suffering while we are dying?). We celebrated this opportunity to talk openly about death and dying. The silence around this topic in our culture is not helpful. We recognized that there is no time to waste, no time to "mess" around.
Chocolate cake was well received.
We meet again on November 18, 2pm at the Leaven Community ...
We had a virtual Death Café meeting on October 17, 2023 via Zoom. Buffy Peters from Hamilton’s Academy of Grief & Loss was our facilitator. There were a total of six people who joined Buffy online. Many thoughts and ideas about death and dying were metioned during the meeting. We spent some time discussing how we remember our loved ones and different ways to make remembrance unique and meaningful. This time also included a brief discussion about how we handle end of life processes and ways to enhance end of life and death. We talked about different ways that people seek comfort, like, art therapy, yoga, and meditation ...
Our October Death Cafe was described by attendees as ‘eye-opening’, ‘comforting’, ‘beautiful’ ‘relaxed’ and ‘peaceful’. Held in an airy creative space in our new local library location, not even the odd library goer wandering into the room could overly disrupt or disturb the conversation.
It always amazes me, how complete strangers can not only be drawn together by a common goal and interest, but how they can share so courageously and sincerely stories which are incredibly intimate and personal. And again, I’m struck by how death-positive conversations are not only profoundly powerful and transformative for all concerned, but how much they are needed in the community.
After ten years of hosting Death Cafes I some times ask myself why I keep doing it. Tonight was the perfect reminder! Ten people from around the world talking about different aspects of death and dying in a respectful way is so energizing.
A group of around 15 people gathered in Peckham Levels with the trains thundering past outside the window. Much laughter and tears and good cake was on offer too. Points raised in the discussion included:
If you want to work out what a 'bad death' is, it's probably better to start with what you believe to be a 'good death'.
Could anxieties about whether you achieved what you wanted for the wider good mean you might have a bad death, even if you're not in pain etc.?
Legacy/how you want to be remembered doesn't have to be anything large scale, but it's up ...
Our September Death Cafe was the first after a long hiatus, and although it fell on a holiday weekend here in Sydney with few attending, the conversation was lively, warm and inclusive.
As usual, topics included the afterlife and spirituality as well as people talking about what brought them to Death Cafe. Some were questioning the existence of God and the loss of their faith, others wanted to be in the company of like-minded souls, free to discuss death and dying in a supportive and understanding environment.
Although it has been a long time since I held a Death Cafe one thing has definitely not changed, how fast ...
Death Café in North Canterbury recently, in Rangiora (17.09.2023)
We held our monthly Death Café North Canterbury – it was a quieter meeting, just three souls but this gave room for an in-depth discussions and insights. We explored whether there was a pattern here: when one spouse dies, the other spouse is not invited out as much? We thought this happens a lot and shared many stories of friends and family where this has occurred – and that they experienced effectively a ‘double grief’?
Stay well and keep talking, Liz :)
I AM THANKFUL THAT THE DEATH CAFE' WEBSITE HAS A LISTING WHERE FOLKS CAN SEARCH FOR DEATH CAFE' DISCUSSIONS THAT ARE SCHEDULED. THIS HAD HELPED PEOPLE FROM OUT OF MY AREA TO COME JOIN IN ON THE EVENTS BEING HELD HERE. THERE WAS ONLY ONE PERSON WHO ATTENDED THE CAFE' TODAY. WE HAD A DELIGHTFUL SESSION AND I PLAN TO HOST THIS AGAIN NEXT YEAR. I CHOOSE TO MEET IN OCTOBER, AS THE SEASON SEEMS TO BE A GOOD TIME TO DISCUSS DEATH, AS THE WEATHER COOLS AND LEAVES ARE FALLING AND SOME LIVING THINGS ARE IN THE PROCESS OF PREPARING TO HIBERNATE OR GO DORMANT. WITH HALLOWEEN ...
We enjoyed tea, cake and cookies (or biscuits, if you prefer!) yesterday on a bright, beautiful Portland afternoon.
A poem by John O'Donohue launched a lively, heartfelt, and compassionate discussion of the different ways that we grieve. We discussed the use and limits of Oregon's Assisted Suicide law. We shared our different experiences with end of life care in hospitals and the lack of readily available information about what the final days and hours of life might look like. We discussed what a gift it would be to our families if we cleaned out our stuff before we die: https://www.thespruce.com/swedish-death-cleaning-4801461
Before we ...
We continue to meet regularly since launching the meeting on June 2022. Our conversations are always spontaneous and invariably interesting.
if you would like details of our next meeting please contact John on 07850366315 or firstname.lastname@example.org
We had a virtual death café on September 19, 2023 via Zoom. Buffy Peters from Hamilton’s Academy of Grief and Loss was our facilitator. There were a total of nine people who joined Buffy online.
One thing that we focused on discussing, is when to have conversations with loved ones about death. For some, it is so important to have conversations pertaining to our wishes, what we do and don’t want, transportation and disposition of our bodies, what is & isn’t allowed in our state, and all things death. For others, they would rather not have those discussions and let their loved ones make those decisions ...
I noticed that there have been not activity on this DC.
I would like to take over the name of this Death Cafe as I live in Reno
The cafe went well. The turn out was small but the conversations went deep for 1 1/2 hours. The space in the library was very nice and it was private so we were able to talk in depth where we might not have been able to as much in a more open venue like a juice bar or restaraunt. I am glad I chose it. The participants want to do this monthly and hopefully a regular schedule will bring more peopel in to the group.
We even discussed joining the movement to bring a "Composting " option to Southern Oregon.